I'm Having a Ball

I'm cleaning out a closet. For some unfathomable reason, Rachel told me today she wanted to jump rope. I thought we had an official jump rope, so off I went, delving into the unknown depths of the front closet. I know there are coats in that closet, waiting for a less-than-100 degree day, should that blessed event ever occur. But I was quite unaware of all the other things in that closet. Here is what I found while looking for the jump rope:

• 22 tennis balls
• 21 golf balls
• 12 wiffle balls
• 3 hard rubber bouncy balls
• 2 soft rubber world globe balls
• 2 black tension-reliever squeeze balls
• 1 cricket ball
• 1 Panther Pride mini football
• 1 Panther Pride mini basketball
• 1 uninflated Mavericks basketball
• 1 nerf football
• 1 street hockey ball
• 1 hard foam ball
• 1 hard rubber egg
• 1 pompom from a UofM ski cap
• 1 marble
• 1 beanbag
• 6 shuttlecocks
• 1 very large bat bag full of baseball stuff--baseballs, softballs, bats, gloves, helmets

There were also numerous tools for hitting these balls, but I won't go into that.

I wish the story would stop here, but alas, I hang my head in shame to tell what else I found. I found about 30 pieces of bubble gum that had been there since my married son was in 10th grade (you do the math). And if that is all I found, it wouldn't be so bad. The trouble was that there were numerous pieces of this gum with the, well, gum missing. The waxed wrappers where still mostly there, somewhat shredded by something--I hate to think what.

And after all that, Rachel said the jump rope was too short. So I gave her an extension cord, and that worked just fine.