The Mind of a 5 Year Old

I'm happy to report that Rachel ended her student teaching in Kindergarten on a positive note. I enjoyed hearing her stories the last six weeks of the funny things that happened to her, most of which had nothing to do with teaching. Here are some examples:

Rachel: I got some nice gifts from my students when I finished student teaching.
Me: What did you get?
Rachel: An apron that is decorated with a cloth flower pot and flower petals which are the thumbprint of all the students.
Me: Cool.
Rachel: Yes it is. But I'll never use it. I'll just hang it on the wall for decoration.
Me: What else?
Rachel: A really ugly charm bracelet with school-themed charms. I'll never wear it, I'll just put it on the wall for decoration.
Me: What else?
Rachel: Kids' books. I'll use those.

Rachel: Mom, today one of the little boys unzipped the dress of one of the little girls.
Me, rather shocked: Whoa! What did you do?
Rachel: Well, I zipped it back up, of course.

Rachel: Today one of the kids hit me, and it really hurt.
Me: Did you hit him back?
Rachel: Of course not, do you want me to be arrested for child abuse?

Rachel: Today I got graded on how well I dressed for teaching.
Me: How did you do?
Rachel: Well, the teacher liked my new suit, but she said she couldn't give me full credit.
Me: Why's that?
Rachel: When I squated down to help a student the top of my underwear showed. I should have worn bikinis.

Rachel: But that's not as bad as what happened to this other student teacher.
Me: What's that?
Rachel: She leaned over a student and the kid asked her why her lungs were falling out.